During a recent podcast conversation with Mitch Weisburgh, the author of “Mindshifting: Stop Your Brain from Sabotaging Your Happiness and Success,”, I found myself connecting his ideas to a challenge instructional coaches and school leaders frequently encounter. At times, teachers come to a coach asking, “What can I do?” while simultaneously believing there is little they can do. They have already concluded that the situation is unlikely to change, that the causes are beyond their control, or that there simply isn’t a workable solution. Before they can consider new strategies or a different approach, they frequently need to rethink how they are understanding the challenge.

• Students aren’t engaged.
• A lesson didn’t go as planned.
• A new instructional strategy isn’t producing the desired results.
• PLC members are not collaborating

Weisburgh described mindshifting as recognizing when our thinking has become trapped in habitual patterns, assumptions, or automatic reactions that limit our options. Rather than immediately searching for an answer, mindshifting invites us to step back, examine the lens through which we are viewing the situation, and consider alternative perspectives. When the lens changes, new possibilities often emerge.

As coaches, we frequently recognize possible next steps because our experience has provided us with ideas, strategies, and examples that might help. The temptation is to move quickly toward offering a solution to the problem. But our coaching experience has reinforced an important coaching adage: go slow to go fast. The quality of coaching is often determined less by the coach’s knowledge of how to solve a teacher’s problem and more by the coach’s ability to generate reflection that leads to possibilities.

Effective coaching questions slow down thinking. They create space between an automatic conclusion and a thoughtful examination of what might actually be occurring.

Consider a teacher who states, “My students just aren’t engaged.” A coach offering strategies to increase engagement is assuming that the teacher’s diagnosis is accurate and complete. If it isn’t, the teacher is ill-prepared to effectively assess a coach’s suggestion.

A coach seeking to promote a mindshift might instead ask:

What are students doing that leads you to conclude they are disengaged?

Are all students demonstrating the same behaviors?

When during the lesson did you notice the greatest engagement?

What might students say was happening for them during that time?

What else might explain what you observed?

Notice that none of these questions provide a solution. Instead, they encourage the teacher to examine assumptions, consider additional evidence, and explore alternative interpretations. That shift in perspective is what opens the door to new possibilities.

The conversation might sound something like this. The coach does not begin by offering engagement strategies. The coach first helps the teacher examine the assumptions embedded in the statement, “My students just aren’t engaged.”

Coach: What are you seeing that leads you to describe students as not engaged?

Teacher: Many aren’t participating. When I ask questions, only a few students offer to respond.

Coach: Are all students demonstrating the same behaviors?

Teacher: No. There are always a handful who participate, but more of the class doesn’t.

Coach: Tell me about the students who are participating. What are they doing?

Teacher: They’re answering questions, talking with their partners, and volunteering ideas.

Coach: During the lesson, was there a point when more students seemed involved?

Teacher: When students were discussing examples with partners, there was more energy in the room.

Coach: What was different about that part of the lesson?

Teacher: They were doing the talking instead of listening to me explain.

Coach: If I asked students what was happening for them during that portion of the lesson, what might they say?

Teacher: They’d probably say they had something to figure out and someone to talk with about it.

Coach: What do you make of that?

Teacher: It could be that they’re less engaged during the parts of the lesson when I’m doing most of the talking. They need the information, but maybe I’ve been thinking too narrowly about how they get it. I’m wondering how I could involve them more while they’re learning it.

Coach: How does that shift the question you’re trying to answer?

Teacher: I’m wondering how I might redesign parts of the lesson so students are doing more of the thinking and processing.

Coach: What possibilities come to mind?

Teacher: I could shorten my explanations and have students discuss key ideas with a partner before moving on. I might also have students generate examples rather than providing them myself.

Coach: Both of those ideas seem connected to what you noticed about students being more engaged when they had something to figure out together. I wonder what might happen if students encountered an example first and worked in pairs to identify patterns before your explanation.

Teacher: That could be interesting. They’d be doing some of the thinking before I introduced the concept.

Coach: Is that a possibility worth testing? What would you want to watch for if you tried it?

Teacher: I’d want to see whether more students participate in the discussion and whether they ask different kinds of questions during the explanation.

At this point, the coach is no longer helping the teacher reframe the challenge. The coach has joined the teacher in exploring possibilities. The possibilities emerge from the teacher’s observations and thinking rather than from the coach’s expertise. The conversation has shifted from solving a problem to designing an experiment.

Notice the mindshift that occurred. The teacher began with the conclusion, “My students just aren’t engaged.” Through reflection, that conclusion became a new question: “How might I redesign parts of the lesson, so students are doing more of the thinking and processing?”

When conclusions become questions, possibilities emerge.

By slowing down, examining assumptions, and creating space for reflection, coaches help teachers move beyond habitual thinking and discover new questions worth exploring. Those mindshifts often become the starting point for meaningful learning and change.

How do the words teachers hear from school leaders, instructional coaches and peers provide an uplift and motivation? Are there time that the words teachers hear create a subtle source of stress, confusion, or disengagement? Our language can be a vehicle through which expectations, emotions, and commitments are transmitted.  What we say—and just as importantly, what we don’t say—can directly influence teacher growth, agency, and energy. Consider how your intentional language can empower your coachees, team members and staff, fostering a culture where trust, clarity and motivation thrive.

Read “Empowering Others Through Words,” from Phoenix Perform here.

Subscribe to the Steve Barkley Ponders Out Loud podcast on iTunes or visit BarkleyPD.com to find new episodes!

Podcast Transcript:

[00:00:00.000] – Steve [Intro]
Welcome to the Steve Barkley Ponders Out Loud podcast. As instructional coaches and school leaders, you are tasked with guiding continuous teacher growth to create student success. This podcast looks to support you with strategies from experienced guests, as well as my own insights that I’ve gathered over the years. I’m thrilled to have you with us. Thanks for tuning in.

[00:00:30.000] – Steve
Coaches’ Words that Empower. Words carry weight, especially in schools. Educators have countless research studies that exhibit the power of teachers’ language on students’ effort and learning outcomes. As an example, the research of Carol Dweck shows that students who hear you worked really hard on this instead of you’re so smart show significant improvement on subsequent task and are more willing to tackle difficult challenges, while those praised for intelligence actually decline in performance. Jeffrey Cohen’s studies on wise criticism reinforce the power of words. In one study, students who received feedback that said, “I’m giving you this criticism because I have very high expectations and know that you can reach them,” were much more likely to revise and resubmit their essays and went on to achieve better long-term outcomes. So the question is, can the words that teachers hear from school leaders, instructional coaches, and peers provide an uplift and motivation. A blog post from Phoenix Perform, reinforces that language can be a powerful lever for motivation, clarity, and belonging, or it can be a subtle source of stress, confusion, or disengagement. You’ll find the link to that blog in this podcast lead-in. The authors remind us that language is the vehicle through which expectations, emotions, and commitments are transmitted.

[00:02:25.100] – Steve
In my own work with instructional coaches and school leaders, I often emphasize that what we say, and just importantly, what we don’t say, can directly influence teacher growth, agency, and energy. Let’s explore how our intentional language might empower our coaches, our team members, and school staff, fostering a culture where trust, clarity, and motivation thrive. The post from Phoenix Perform shares four dimensions of empowering language that can provide a lens for leaders to reflect on and refine our communication. One, capability language, two, ownership language, three, growth language, and four, purpose language. Capability language language highlights potential and learning. As a coach or leader, we need to use language that reinforces a belief in the teacher’s or a team’s ability to rise to the challenge. This really echoes Carol Dwek’s work, focusing on effort and possibility over fixed traits. Empowering language emphasizes that someone can and will learn and do rather than focusing on limits or deficits. It helps people believe in their own capacity to grow. Co-construction of next steps in a coaching conversation communicates capacity building. The questions the teacher and the coach ask each other allow them to explore their own understandings. Reflecting on and responding to each other’s contributions creates alternatives and is empowering to the teacher.

[00:04:42.260] – Steve
Ownership language. Ownership language encourages responsibility without blame. It invites reflection and action. Ownership language helps people consider how their choices affect the outcomes, rather rather than shifting blame or feeling helpless. Ownership-oriented questions create a space for agency. They gently guide a person to examine their practice without defensiveness, shifting the focus from external problems to internal choices. This fits a strategy that I often use called Gripes to Goals. Here’s what that might sound like in a conversation with a teacher. A teacher begins with a gripe. “Too many students don’t care about their grades. There’s no way to motivate them to work. Failing them isn’t a threat.” The coach might respond with this statement: “You have a strong desire for all your students to do well.” The teacher: “Absolutely. They don’t see the cost to their future of the choices they’re making now.” Coach: “Grades, as a reward or a threat, just don’t seem to communicate the message that you want them to hear.” Teacher: “It may actually be making things worse.” Coach: “You see a need to find a different way to motivate your students.” At this point, with the teacher having a goal, the teacher has ownership of the the next direction that the coach and the teacher would take.

[00:06:34.940] – Steve
Growth language. Growth language turns setbacks into opportunities. It frames mistakes or failures as learning moments. It fosters a culture of psychological safety where trying, reflecting, and adjusting are the expected parts of the process. “What did you learn from trying that strategy? What might you adjust for next time?” This language aligns with the spirit of wise criticism, holding high standards while affirming a belief in the teacher’s ability to grow. It isn’t winning or losing that produces the learning. It’s the debriefing and analyzing of the process that produces knowledge that one can gain from. Teachers, mentors, and coaches help us learn from our experience win or lose. It’s really why the question, “What did you learn today?” is one of my most frequently used post-conference questions. Lastly, purpose language connects task to meaningful outcomes. Purpose language helps people see how their work contributes to something larger. It transforms routine tasks into intentional actions that align with shared goals. When teachers see how their contributions matter, motivation rises. Purpose builds commitment. Coaching conversations, where the teacher’s agenda emerges and develops over time increases understanding, builds trust, and promotes vulnerability and risk-taking. The teacher’s agenda includes her beliefs, values, and thinking behind her decisions.

[00:08:48.120] – Steve
A general guideline that I recommend is that as a coach, I want to know what the teacher is thinking before I’m sharing what I am thinking as coach. In every hallway conversation, coaching session, PLC meeting or email, our words carry the potential to empower or to unintentionally discourage. When we speak with intention, choosing language that communicates capability, fosters ownership, frames growth, and connects to purpose. We don’t support our colleagues, we strengthen the culture of our schools. Teachers, like students, thrive when they feel seen, believed in, and connected to meaningful work. As leaders and coaches, we can build that sense of connection through the everyday language that we use. Empowering language isn’t about being nice, it’s about being intentional. And in schools, intentional language can be a quiet but powerful lever for teacher growth, collective efficacy, and better outcomes, most importantly for students. Consider this quote from that Phoenix Perform article: “Every conversation is a performance. Are you empowering or disempowering with your words?” Thanks for listening, folks. Consider taping an upcoming conference or two with a coachee. As you play it back, just analyze how strong your language empowered and what changes you might want to make.

[00:10:49.700] – Steve
Our words are important.

[00:10:53.640] – Steve [Outro]
Thanks for listening, folks. I’d love to hear what you’re pondering. You can find me on Twitter or LinkedIn at Steve Barkley, or send me your questions and find my videos and blogs at barkleypd.com.

Have you ever had this happen?

Coach: Thanks for meeting before our coaching observation. What would you like me to focus on when I come into your classroom?

Teacher: Honestly, I don’t really have anything specific. You can just come in and watch.

Coach: Okay… sometimes teachers ask me to look at student engagement, questioning, or how transitions are going. Is there something in your teaching that you’ve been curious about lately?

Teacher: Not really. Things are going pretty smoothly. I’m fine with you just getting a sense of the class overall.

Coach: Got it. Sometimes even choosing a small area gives us a way to reflect together. For example, I could watch how students respond when you give directions or at different spots in the lesson.

Teacher: No, that’s fine. I’d rather you just come in and take a look at whatever you notice.

Coach: All right then. I’ll come in tomorrow and just observe the whole lesson.

Eric Crabtree, Elementary Principal at American Cooperative School of La Paz, just provided me with the perfect description of what happens if you proceed with the observation and post-conference following such a pre-conference conversation. Its stepping into quicksand! As soon as Eric mentioned that description, I told him I would be sharing it. During the observation after such a conversation, I can imagine a sinking feeling setting in and a panic feeling beginning as a post conference proceeds. I imagine quicksand feels the same.

A lack of focus for an observation often leads to negative outcomes.

• Misaligned expectations: The coach and teacher may end up zeroing in on mismatched priorities.
• Eroded trust: Without clarity, the teacher may feel misunderstood and unsupported. The coach’s feedback can be interpreted as evaluative since the coach chose what to focus on.
• Lost learning opportunities: Coaching becomes less impactful if it’s not tied to agreed-upon objectives.
• Wasted time: Observations and feedback that lack purpose, become diffuse and not actionable.
• Fragmented coaching: Without clear goals, it’s hard to follow up meaningfully or build momentum.

For me, pre-conferencing is the most critical element to having effective coaching, yet strangely enough, it’s often the component that people who are pressed for time most commonly end up shortchanging or even skipping. When I’m designing a training program for coaches, I put the greatest amount of time into understanding and practicing effective pre-conferences. If my pre-conferences lead to increased understanding of the teacher’s agenda (the thinking behind the teaching/learning design and desired impact) I can observe through the teacher’s eyes as well as my own. If the pre-conference identifies clearly what the teacher is seeking as a focus, I know exactly what to do and record during my observation. I am clear on the feedback the teacher is looking for when I walk into the post-conference. When evaluators come into the classroom, they actually have to avoid getting a focus because if they get a focus it throws off the accuracy of their evaluation. Evaluators need to pay attention to everything. When the coach comes into the classroom, they’re going to disregard the majority of what’s going on, and zero in on that on that small focus piece.  I build my trust as a coach by delivering through the observation and the post-conference what we had agreed to in the pre-conference.

Here is an example of a coach assisting the teacher who states that they do not have a focus.

Coach: Thanks for meeting before our coaching observation. What would you like me to focus on when I come into your classroom?

Teacher: Honestly, I don’t really have anything specific. You can just come in and watch.

Coach: During the lesson I am observing, what’s the most important thing you need the students to do?

Teacher: Well, they are going to be working in triads to solve a few math problems that are different from, yet connected, to concepts we’ve been working on. When they discover that they initially, don’t know what to do, I need them to do some analyzing, trying out ideas, and persevering beyond the first “that didn’t work.”

Coach: That sounds great, and I am guessing, challenging, especially from some students.

Teacher: Some students do a very quick, “ I don’t know how to do this.” and shut down. That can lead to wasted time. Mostly they stay on task. Some groups do better than others.

Coach: What are the important things that you imagine yourself doing during the time that the triads are working?

Teacher: I’ll be moving around the groups and encouraging them to keep persevering and trying a different approach.

Coach: What might that encouragement sound like?

Teacher: Maybe giving positive feedback for a strategy that didn’t work. Maybe giving a clue for something to consider or try. I might be able to send a student from one group that successfully solved the problem to be a coach to another group.

Coach: Great options. As I observe all that interaction among students in triads and you with the triads, I am wondering if there’s some focus I might observe and record for your reflection afterwards.

Teacher: I would be interested in knowing what happens in a triad after I have spent some time interacting with them.

Coach: That is interesting. What if I made a map of where the groups are located and as often as I can, record on the map what you said when you stopped by and then observe a few moments after you move on to another group? I’d catch as many sequences as I can. Might that information be interesting for your reflection.

Teacher: Yeah, it would. You’ll see and hear things I don’t as I am busy with the next group.

Coach: I am looking forward to observing and hearing your reflections.

With gentle persistence and targeted questioning, the coach can generate teacher reflection on the planned learning activity and move from vague reluctance to a specific, actionable focus.  Such a pre-conference often increases the teachers awareness during the lesson which adds to greater reflection and learning in the post conference.

I use the last and first weeks of the year to break from writing a new blog and look to provide some previous work that can encourage reflection. I pulled some of my thinking that focusses on coaches having a repertoire of practices that enable them to align their coaching approach to meet the agenda, goals, and capabilities of the coachee. This video (9 minutes) provides definitions and examples of kinds of coaching.

This blog and podcast explore further the “Barkley Coaching Model.”

Kevin Schlomer, an instructional coaching coordinator, created The Coaching Balance Scale which considers coaches’ and teachers’ engagement with each other. Learn more about Kevin’s insights in this blog or podcast.

How does your coaching approach or your school’s explanation of coaching encourage maximum teacher engagement and openness to continued learning? Are there modifications or additions you might want to explore?

Last week I had the opportunity to return to the Pride Academy in East Orange, NJ and spend time with staff as they prepared for the start of a new school year. Last year the Pride Academy received an Effective Practice Incentive Community (EPIC) Silver Gains Award for Driving Dramatic Student Achievement Gains.